If Only I Could Turn Back Time

I've been editing my resume over and over again. There is one item in it that I really want to erase, but it would appear questionable without it.My interviewer would be puzzled on what did I do for 3 long years.Two years plus three years, actually. I didn't want my emotion to rule over me but honestly, I feel like it should. Months ago, I admit that I've erased the "two-year job" indicated in my resume.Those two lonely years filled with stress and pressure. I feel that if I'd delete it from my resume I would forget all the hurt and anxieties that those years brought me but it never happens. Something happened last March that triggered me to strike it out from my resume. I don't want to remember that incident anymore. Right now, I am really thinking of removing the "three-year job" and simply say, well okay, I have no job for the first 2 years and the other 3 years. I just learned something that made me decide about it. I am trying to do my best in anything but still I'm being the one misinterpreted. Yes, I am not perfect, but to accuse me of something I didn't do is way too unfair. I get angry at times but I always control it. I even locked myself in the comfort room rather than shouting at someone who hurt me. And then now, I would discover that this person sees me as the bad one. It's so disappointing. The working environment taught me to be strong because I needed to.I'm hiding my crybaby side at all. Yes, I'm strict but I don't humiliate others. Well, it's really true that you can't please anyone. All I wish for is for me to forget all the bad things in those 5 years and let the good things remain. (if any)

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Wallpaper Laws and Policies

We have laws, policies, rules and regulations. Even the smallest organization is equipped with policies. But there are times that those things are treated as wallpapers, decorations and worst, as trash. 

I remember my law professor once said that some laws are "hinatable" (derived from Bicol word "hinat" or "nahihinat" which means stretchable or flexible). He further said that this happens when laws are not fully applied or applied with some considerations. What are those considerations? It can be humanitarian or merely influence.... or should I say, just like a parent or a teacher who plays favorites. There are advantages and disadvantages. One advantage is that, you gave chance to that person after committing mistakes to rise up again, provided that he really deserves that chance. Well, it is still valid, right? So if that person committed a heavy offense but he promised not to do it again, some bosses or authorities would just say, "ah well, ok, stick to your promise." And we have to admit, most of us Filipinos, have soft hearts. It's not bad after all. But when needed, we truly have to be firm and stick to the policies not to the promises of erring workers. One of the disadvantages of the "hinatable policies" or laws is that, it gives people the picture of leniency and they can do what they want over and over again. Or might as well, some would also commit the same mistake because the first offender was pardoned easily. In an organization, workplace, local or national scene, everywhere, if the law-making body  shows leniency in implementing rules and regulations, there will be no room for improvement and those policies will just be laughed at and will be put to trash. What is now the use of coming up with those policies if it is not effectively implemented? We are taught to be good persons but it does not include the idea of tolerating violations of policies and laws. We should not be called kind, then, but idiots. It is happening most of the time. If we are dreaming to have a community where equality exists and justice prevails, we should do our part. Each of us should do something and make a difference. 

the laugh laugh laugh addict

I prefer radio more than TV. Just love listening to music because it calms a wounded  heart and heals a bad mood. I also love listening to radio shows. They are inspiring and enlightening. That's why I was so overwhelmed when offered a volunteer hosting slot in a local FM radio. I've been doing it for 3 years. Right now, I  have a show once in a week with religious co-hosts. We admit that we have ups and downs. We started so well. We gained lots of listeners. We have many promos and prizes. But sometimes, we couldn't attend to our show because we are all busy in our respective work. We usually receive 30 plus messages during our show, which overwhelms us. We also receive positive and negative comments. We all treasure those things. The usual comment we receive is that, we are laughing most of the time. Some would say that it sounds annoying and irritating over the radio. We noted that. Personally, I control my laughter and would just smile or bite my lips or would just turn away from the microphone so that I will not be heard when I'm laughing. Truly, we accept our mistake. We are just joyful persons and we enjoy each other's company.

However, I couldn't believe that I will be one of those people who finds laughing on air annoying. I really thought it is cool all the time, but it is not because to be laughed at is such an irritating and embarrassing experience, especially if it's done on air. I have been experiencing this for a lot of times but I just ignore it. However, I guess, my patience vanished that time. I was sharing something eagerly and the person who is inside the booth but not part of our show, started laughing so I stopped talking. I thought that something was wrong with my microphone. But I was wrong.She was laughing over my manner of talking and my co-hosts also asked me something like in a way of a joke. So I wrinkled because I couldn't accept that I sound mad while sharing, just like what they said. For me, I was just talking naturally, I wasn't even cracking jokes that's why I was shocked that they burst out laughing. Then, I just kept quiet. I didn't want to make a big deal out of it because I'm used to that kind of atmosphere but I realize that it was a form of disrespect. It's like I'm inside the classroom and my classmates were laughing at me while I'm called during a recitation. It is such a bad feeling. If to them, it is just a so-so ordinary laughter, well, for me, they should refrain from doing so because it's not really good to be laughed at without a valid reason. We can play jokes but if someone is serious of sharing ideas and the like, we should listen and smile if we want, but don't laugh. 

I am not angry, I'm just upset because we are all grownups. We should act like grownups too. Laughing is the best way to ease emotional pain but we should laugh only in the right time and place for the right reason. We are not crazy. We are not stupid. Yes, live, love and laugh but know our limits.